at first, i was a little perturbed watching M.o.a.G.

i mean, in that setting, in the 1930s... the Japs in the country side cant possibly be speakin perfect english, can they ??

it was a mental block, like seeing GREEN. it doesnt fit. get what i mean? the 3 female leads were really beautiful, each in their own way. cant wait to read the book.


joseph said i made him feel small and stupid. *smirkin.* which is the exact opposite in real life.

joseph is my colleague. not that literately big headed sec sch mate of mine. this joseph is very well built and muscled and has earned his way into the NTU and he said i made him feel small and stupid even tho he has been workin 1.5 years longer than me.

HAHAHAHAH. i dun get it. how can it be?

i didnt even set out to insult him or anything!!!!!!!!


he said that after i entered PM, his life has changed. altho he wouldnt say if it is for the better. coz i am the only one who lets him do condiments instead of sweepin or moppin.


and well, i really wanted to blog abt the sentence he said.

my life has changed ever since you came to work here.



he dropped this sentence very off handedly, in a platonic way.


i just wish i have a someone to tell this sentence to. altho it wouldnt be this exact sentence , of coourse.


when will i ever say, my life has changed ever since i know you?

who has the ability to change my life so drastically that i realized it has been changed after all...?

yesterday marked the start of the last time my age will start with a '1'.

i didnt realize this til huien pointed this uselessly cool fact out to me. i am like, -.-, no diff to me.

i still go to sch, didnt pon class, present lousily, spoilt my beaded belt,say wrong things and failed my basic theory test. (which i will retake in 2 weeks' time) and attended the installation like everyone else.



OH whatever.


the ateam sang me a birthday song.

S.U bought me a chocolate cake and i took thrice to blow out all the candles. and then, they pushed my face into 1/5 of the cake. which we subsequently divided to give to people. so yah, some people ate cake with traces of my sweat and make up in it.

i wonder if its delicious???

and well, i didnt got a lot of presents, but its enough! they gave such big, bulky presents!!!! so hard to carry!!!! and it got so heavy after everything added up and i almost got stuck in the MRT barrier and Bus entrance/exit.



i looked comical. i even feel comical.





and then, just now didnt turn out so great, did it? it felt lousy for my part . to think , i was lookin forward to it.why is that the case?


i guess i really sucks at EQ. if u has seen my reaction ... ... u definately would have LOL.



sigh, i cant help feelin that i felt the way i did coz i was selfish. i dun like to share with any1 for any1's time or attention ... ... it compromises on the quality time for me to play catch up. AAaaARRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHH. whatever.


and i take time to warm up to people. esp total strangers whom i will neveeer see again. no point in makin effort to remenber the names.



so... what did i do? run away. alone. felt better on my own than with a bunch people i am not comfortable with. i dun intrude ur space and u dun intrude mine.

Your EQ is

153 50 or less: Thanks for answering honestly. Now get yourself a shrink, quick! 51-70: When it comes to understanding human emotions, you'd have better luck understanding Chinese. 71-90: You've got more emotional intelligence than the average frat boy. Barely. 91-110: You're average. It's easy to predict how you'll react to things. But anyone could have guessed that. 111-130: You usually have it going on emotionally, but roadblocks tend to land you on your butt. 131-150: You are remarkable when it comes to relating with others. Only the biggest losers get under your skin. 150+: Two possibilities - you've either out "Dr. Phil-ed" Dr. Phil... or you're a dirty liar.

What's Your EQ (Emotional Intelligence Quotient)?

weelll. i am shocked. i am NOT a dirty liar. ehhh. i guess i noe what are the right things to do. just whether i feel its worth doing it or not... ...=)

well, i turned up at sch lookin like a death eater, despite the fact that i was the only one who said that we shouldnt wear all black, for colors are crucial!!!!

and i was the only 1 who is wearing 100 % black, save for the white straps on my feet.


so, right, i feel quite dots. but lucky, it looks cool.


so what now....placid has 3 hours to kill b4 THE time finally arrives.


eeks!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yt must sound confident AND EXCITING!!! can she do it? ( CANNOT LAH. i am not being mean. she said one.) this is an order from our CEO, alex shieh!!!!!!

so, yah, shall report on how exciting she is gonna sound later!

NYP Open House 2006 has a lousy goodie bag with 'freebies' llike dated magazines. so much for people tellin to steal some exxtra goodie bags for them. well, u wouldnt want anything from there!

everyday at Open house, we got free macdonald's fifty cents ice cream though. thats the small perk i guess. lol.


there is new diploma, in resort management! they placed a stupid lookin beach umbrella thinggy complete with pots of plants, in the middle of the auditorium and it looked SO fake!


and a bunch of us 'signed up' for Singapore Idol! lol. dun worry, we wont go audition. we just wan the free t-shirt. lol. i think the guy at the booth couldnt tahann us le.


and i bumped into Daphe in the toilet when she came to Open house. wouldnt have see her if she never called me. told her maybe i wanna go back to FA when its holidays. and then in the late afternoon, weili called me to ask when i can go back work!


they r SOoO desperate for manpower. lol. coz they hired some imcompetent workers and the good ones r leavin instead of the bad ones, in her own words.



a diploma is Nothing special unless it is a diploma with merit. and merit is of course defined by ur Grade Point Average , so... how much does cca points count? does it really matter if u have a lot/little/ none????????

i saw God today.


he was fit to be one anyway. he would make a very fit God! God was a term KW used to describe the sportspeople who can do REALLY well, and i followed his terminlogy.

anyway, today, the God's name was Ang Chee Yong, who looked really fierce as he was running the 25 laps around the field. he was leading ALL THE WAY and he took about 87 seconds to finish each lap.


at the end of the race, he leads the next runner by 2 rounds.


OMG! how fast is that? his legs never stopped pumping at his fast pace, and his timing was about 20 minutes faster than the last runner. all through the way, i watched him run with half horror- and half fascination as i couldnt fathom how on earth could some1 run like he dun need a break and run as tho he is energizer bunny always on a fresh batteries diet.


thats why he is god! whahahahahhahaha.

sok mum has a crush on him!!!!!!!!!!!!!

whahhaahah, just kiddin.

oh-oh. i still got time to come here while my peers r busy with the projects. * what is wrong with me?

and i still got time to change blogskin!? suddenly i think Ashlee simpson is cool. stood up after the SNL fall. but i dun like her being blond.


anyway maybe i am too lucky, that the the bulk of responsiblities ISNT with me..that y i can watch with ease while they r scrambling to get work done... no i am not doing that. thats not me. shall wait for any potential SOS directed to me.


i think the cold weather has bid us farewell already. so has my insane desire of owning a pair of boots.

sunny weather once again is KING.with my disfigured pink cap, and hiding under a shade, i still managed to get burnt. yesh, i have red cheeks now which are peelin disgustingly...and i have to get sunburnt just in time for the chinese new year? must i reallly wear sunblock 24/7?





*HO HO HO, alex shieh just said there is no worries about my part for PR- so glad!

very cold. very very cold! my hands and feet r so cold! january isnt supposed to be cold and rainy is it?


i helped out at the kiara gong shi jia's concert. she is another sunyanzi. looked very nice on photos but close-up, the skin is like orange... damm sad. even the make up cant hide anything. but she super friendly. oblige with any request, like grp photo, dedications on the cd cover... etc etc, she deserves all the good PR she can get!





i hate murphy's law!

just bought the sunyanzi's a perfect day and the NEXT store sold it at a cheaper price...*puke!

yesterday, i spent a rainy day in town, walkin in the rain ( with umbreLLa ), in heels too. so happy i didnt fall. WHAHAHAHAHA. i even took the effort to doll myself up but only to spoilt the effect the moment i sat with my leg crossed in a really... unrefined way and shaking my feet.

WHAHAHAHHA. wearing jeans mah.


mi and YF slacked in the deserted cafe cartel, my fav restuarant in case u all duno.
the 2 of us enjoyed ourselves in the plush chairs and the big round table. and of course, we helped ourselves to the nice , warm bread.

i like the ribs. which took 2 of us one hour to finish.

i like the brownie my friend ordered too. That was Sinful, with the warm chocolate fudge and ice-cream drenched on top on the brownie. *lickin lips... Dammm nice lah.

in a state of morbid happiness.



my bday actually falls on a busy wednesday = no birthday dinner at some nice restaurant. =(

my friends r busy with projects/sch work = it cant be celebrated anyway.=(

so it shall be postponed to FEB after the exams! NO over eatin, KK warned. he wants to get in shape durin the hols. lose the excess weight to become like syazwan, in his own words. OK. i SUPPORT U!




...in a morbid state of happiness, and i have TWO =( s in a row.



lookin forward to havin (some) bday wishes fulfilled! wHAHAHAHA. ahmadS already told mi he is gettin me THE book. *victory punch!**thank you/euuuuu!!

the cold weather has gotten to me-i've caught a cold. besides a dead brain, i am nursing a blocked nose.

i rather fall sick seriously with a fever or what, rather this blocked nose. still healthy yet not so healthy...it is been a while since i need a doc, i miss the doc! * whahhhaa.

right, besides having a blocked nose, something else is blocked too ! Writer's BLOCK! ARGHHH!=(

i cant seem to get started on Azhar's ICA, thats why i am here in the first place. blogging about writer's block... maybe my writer's block will then disappear? no inspiration as to how to start my conclusion. my god! START a CONCLUSION. *whahahhahaha. hOw ironic can my life be?






______
read ahmadS' post about best friends.



what if i said X is my best friend and i am NOT X's best friend but ranked somewhere DOWN there? thats so... embarrassing? like u got a one sided love affair going on which u mistakenly thought is reciporated.

used to be very sure of myself regarding who is my best friend. but now... huh. not so sure any more. we got so many different social circles and i am not there half the time.

well, nothing has changed on my side and i used to be able to assume confidently on her part. but now, i can only hope that certain things stay the same.


i dun do those best- friends things anymore. at least those potrayed in those Sweet Valley High books kind of activites that i used to follow almost religiously.

i dun spend any time gossiping on the phone with my girl friends, yakking abt sch work, crushes, pop stars, irritating people and clothes.


anyway, what is a best friend? the friend u like most and spend the most time with?

do i need a best friend?

no i dont.

i need true friends. just like i told those ateam interviewers. they had asked what would i do if i make it to ex-co and my friends start getting jealous.

i said, i will ... tell them there is nothing to be jealous of. if they cant get over it.so be it. i 've got no time to care about tiny, shallow, petty hearts.

true friends will be happy for me, in case u forget. despite any jealousies or whatever they might be harbouring.


true friends dun need to be constantly around u, u can just pick things up where u left off and the feel is just as natural and as best-friends-ish as before. now i know why i've got such a small social circle.


my limited social circle is just limited to those who fulfill the criteria above.



so, for me, true = best.

i have a Vision...


i try to have a literately big breakfast every day after i wake up when i have to go to school.

then i can skip lunch! and then save monee! and do dieting on the way!





...Vision: to see my learn-to-drive fund grow as quickly as possible! *=)

i am thinkin about reality.

what is reality? the actual state of being and true?

is there only one reality?

i always thought that in everything, there is only ONE reality which would be universally agreed upon.

suddenly, it hits mi that it is not. suddenly, i feel that reality is only but your perceptions of the circumstances. different realities would be perceived by different points of view and angles...

reality which is true , pure and objective dun exists. only perception does.

u cant change reality. but u can change perceptions! thats y, destiny lies in ur hands!

i had been thinkin, had i really been a mean person.

yes, i deliver scathing remarks which might be intepreted as mean. but most of the time, they are just words running through my brain and i just say them out. they are not meant to be mean. my words might be mean, but my person is not!

i dun deliver words intentionally meant to cause people to be hurt, upset or both. i am not happy when people are upset becoz of me. i dun build my happiness based on other people's misery. my self esteen/ self confidence is not build when i accidentally shatter someone else's. although i hope that never happen before.

kinda sick of hearing that M word, and my name in the same sentence. sarcasm isnt the same as the M word. M word , to me, has a negative connation to it. and i wan to be a person as positive as possible...



my resolutions will be made , kept and remenbered but it wont appear here.


i fall in love with Sunyanzi all over again last night. happen to watch her sing live... on TV. it is only on TV yet i feel she is Amazing singing live. so Wow. who can resist her charms? and her stage presence? and her mega watt smile? her voice? her talents? so envious of those people in the 101 tower.

i am so attending her next concert!!!!!!!